irrational freshie punks

i'm appalled. i know i'm a slacker and have no weight saying all these, but nevertheless...

yesterday night, at about 2am, i saw nat doing all the freshie punks male costumes, gluing them one by one. and where's the rest of the punks? gone sleeping i presume (they better be). anyway, i wasn't really in good mood yesterday night, so i was quite pissed by their attitudes. and as with most of the "pissed-me-off" things that happened in my life, i needed to record it down somewhere so i could probably learn from it. and learned i did.

after writing this and re-reading the paragraphs, i realised that, seriously, i admired nat. she was doing all these things without a single word of complaints. if i were to be in her shoes, i'm pretty sure that i'd be complaining like hell. well, i learned new stuffs today then. so that's good. thank you irrational freshie punks. thanks nat.
---

today, we (jack and i), almost went to ginza. but we didn't go because we couldn't get sufficient people. for the first time i actually saw sw's room door open (it's very rare really, as with my own door, maybe even rarer). got to talk with her for awhile. but she also had lecture. so we had to settle with going back to our own room and slack (jack and i, i mean).

i decided to do the mechanics' visors. since i don't really have scissors, i used penknife. then i realised that i don't want to scratch my own table, so i went down and started doing the visors while reading newspaper. talked to quite a few people, reu, lion and jul. i saw sw again as she went to lecture.

all in all, this semester seems to mark some changes in my life. i begin to think more rationally. i begin to talk more than before. in short, i was opening up. a lot more than i thought would be possible last semester. i just hope that this phenomenon lasts longer than a short stint.

you could also probably see from the development of this blog. i'm becoming less and less anonymous and more and more ready to show the world who i am in actuality. soon enough, i believe that i could drop my pseudonym and came out fresh. back to the blogging world that i left behind as i entered kr.

well, anyway, along with this transformation, i kind of thinking of changing the blog layout again. the design, i mean. i thought of creating a less oppressive design with less "darkness" in it. you could see it for yourself right? the scary eyes, the hollow ichigo picture portrayed at the bottom of the page. it's funny really. the whole colour scheme in itself is cheerful, but inside that cheerful page, there are 2 dark pictures, one of hirako in his scary mode and one of hollow ichigo. it really seems to describe my inner state. cheerful overall, but tainted greatly by the darkness. yeah. the darkness. it ate out all my energies. the hollow part of my heart. it's a perfect depiction really. i do have a hollow in my heart. i realised that long ago, subconsciously i guess. but only now did i understand.

thank you [anonymous].

so what are the steps that i have taken or will take to rectify this? i have some ideas. but i'll gladly go to all the lectures. that would be my first step. i love my courses really. however much i said that i hate them, i really love some of them.

islam and muslim civilization for example. oh yeah, why do a christian like me take on such module. well, to be really honest, i don't even know whether i could call myself christian right now. i hope i could, but maybe not. however, on the contrary, the module really brought some interesting discussion in theology. prof alatas is a really great lecturer. we really had fiery discussion on the two world religions: christianity and islam. we had quite a bit of debate. if any, these debates actually strengthen my weakened belief. at the same time, i don't see why muslims must fight against christians all the time in some part of the world. why the jews are always fighting the arabs in middle east? seriously, the two religions really have a lot more in common than you might imagine. both are based on abrahamic tenets (and likely mosaic covenants). both agreed in most counts up to the death of Jesus. after that, admittedly, both views differ. i suggested that the prof do one session on comparing the two theological points of view. it would be most interesting. his reply was even more interesting. he said he'll try to arrange a meeting between us and a bishop. yes, a bishop. i was quite surprised. i was half expecting him to say an imam instead of a bishop. well. this is going to be really exciting.

the class also allowed me to meet a new friend (with the same name as mine, well, at least the first five letters, although while i'm a man, she's a woman--ah, the distinctive difference between male/female and man/woman, thanks to foundation of engineering course). she's a christian too. but as to how devout she is, i couldn't tell. most likely more devout than me for sure. i can scarcely believe anyone that acknowledge themselves as christians can be worse off than me. we had a short chat after the class and she helped me borrow one of my textbook for the course from central library rbr section.

well, that's islam for me. fun, isn't it? i thought so too!
---

as for the rest of my courses, i will soon have you updated with the happenings in the class. i'm sure this will be most interesting. yep.

meanwhile, i've written too long already. shall post this and get going with my life. all right then.